Indeed, here comes the groom! Let’s not forget him, shall we? I think sometimes the grooms can feel a little lost in the clouds of silk organza and flurries of wedding preparations.

The irrepressible Mark Twain said, “Clothes make the man.” Of course, the rest of that quote is: “Naked people have little or no influence on society.” I bet some grooms could claim kinship with those naked people - in this case with little or no influence, if not on society, then certainly on the wedding attire.

Psst! Guys! Is your sleep haunted by the thoughts of multi-colored cummerbunds and “Miami Vice” suits? Unless your bride to be has never seen you in anything but your faded cut-offs and that horrid moldering t-shirt you insist on keeping around, I bet she thinks you clean up real good! Here’s a tip that might help sway your lady love’s overzealous plans:

Buy, don’t rent.

Yes, I know there can be major funding taking place for the bride’s attire alone. The added cost of purchasing your own tuxedo could be a sticky point in the budget. And if a tuxedo is really more than you wanted to consider, what about a really good suit? You know the kind you can actually get tailored to fit you and not something off the rack? The two of you could shop together and take the opportunity to discuss options. The fact that you will have this “for keeps” will help temper outlandish choices. Not to mention the fact that you would have something dashing for future events. There are quality selections available in a range of prices and places that will take you away from your Don Johnson nightmares and into her Don Juan dreams.

If all else fails and your sphere of influence is still nil, you could always quote Mark Twain and then find a fig leaf!

I just read a great post by Pastor Ed Young. You can find it at The Great Mate Debate, see “Why Plan to Fail.”

I don’t believe many of us go into marriage thinking; “When I get divorced.” Pastor Young talks about taking the time to really get to know the person you are considering spending your life with. And that’s the crux of it, isn’t it? The person you want to spend the rest of your life with. That’s what a marriage is about. Isn’t that “until death do us part” thing part of most ceremonies? If that is not in your plans, then why are you marrying? Spiritual and religious convictions aside, if your spouse to be gives you pause to think about money and assets first, perhaps you haven’t truly found Mr. or Ms. Right?

I have heard people say, “Well, So-and-so needs a prenup. They have all that money, you know.” I’m sure there are couples who believe the prenuptial agreement is vital. Maybe they think it will be a safeguard to wedded bliss. I would say to them, all the more reason to take your time and get to know your loved one. Even so, no matter how well you think you know them; you will still be surprised at the person they become. I have known my husband for 25 years. I learned more about him through each stage of our relationship, from friendship, to courting, to marriage. I never cease to be amazed at the person he has become and the way our love has changed over the years.

To those who still want a prenuptial agreement:

• Do find a good lawyer who can inform you about any legal requirements for your state. They vary.
• Do get individual lawyers for each party. It helps in cases where document enforcement is in question.
• Do cover child custody and visitation, support, premarital assets and debts, estate planning, etc. The more you cover now, the less you might have to worry over later.
• Do provide for flexibility and changes over time. They will come.
• Do be honest. The earlier this issue is approached, the better. Don’t wait until you’ve sent wedding invitations.

Personally, I would have been offended if my hubby had broached the subject with me. Of course, I’ve never had “all that money” to be concerned with, so maybe my perspective is a little different from the bleachers than it is in the box suite!

Some of us are better than others when it comes to tripping the light fantastic. One of things I remember best about my parents over the years was the wonderful way they danced together. Even in my oldest memories they always seemed to move so well together. They made it look effortless and beautiful. I, however, did not inherit that gene!

Those of us who are gifted with two left feet or even a case of dancing nerves may look at the wedding reception’s first dance and cringe. My generation seemed to think that hanging on each other and barely swaying to the music constituted a perfectly acceptable mode of dancing.

If that’s still your thing, go for it. After all, it is your wedding. Everyone will think it’s a lovely dance and it will be! But if you are feeling a bit more daring and might want to pull off something a tad more memorable, how about adding a little choreography? What? Not so brave? What about a lesson or two just to smooth out the steps?

Check out this charming idea from Dallas First Dance. They offer a variety of options for first dances from the waltz to the tango. They also offer semi-private group classes if you want to get some of the wedding party involved. Not in north Texas? Check out your local dance lesson studios for their own take on this idea.

Who knows? You might come away with a new nickname, Twinkle Toes?