Unlike the long standing guy’s last hoorah of the Bachelor’s Party, the more recent trend of a bachelorette party can leave the maid(s) of honor in a quandary. They sometimes can’t decide if it’s really a feminine version of the stag party or an opportunity to fall back to ultra-girly high teas.

If you’re the party planner, the best advice is talk to the bride! An honest discussion of her preferences is key to a successful soiree. After all, the bride may think the stagette party (complete with “Officer Joe” stripper and anatomically correct party favors) is the best idea you’ve ever had or she may be horribly embarrassed. Dinner and a movie or a concert might be more her style.

Alternative choices for girl’s night? Consider some of the following:

• Pamper the bride - check out your local spas for a little luxury treat, facials, wraps and massages to name a few.
• Nature girl - if the bride to be is the outdoorsy type, maybe an overnight camping trip complete with campfires, marshmallows and sleeping bags is in order.
• Pajama party - an old fashioned sleep over complete with manicures, oldies music and hair braiding (note: not a good time to try a new permanent hair dye color on the bride!)

Consult the bride and/or wedding planner for a good date/time to host your party to make sure you won’t conflict with other events. The most often suggested time is about a month prior to the big day with four months prior being the initial invitations date. After all, you want plenty of time to make sure the bride’s chosen friends can be there.

Here is a helpful party checklist from Bridesmaid101.com.

In any case, the bottom line is this is a chance for the bride and her closest friends to acknowledge and celebrate the beginning of a new stage in her life as well as the lives of their friendships.